Lump in my throat...

I just spoke to a colleague, who is travelling home for a week. He is going to Kerala first before he goes to his native. I just inquired, you must be going to get yourself checked for some treatment. He very sadly reminded me of his daughter who passed away last year in one prominent hospital there and she was cremated there itself. He was going to visit her grave before he does anything else. She was once a bubbly 16 year old, a good student and a favorite of her teachers, who was suddenly affected by a bizarre illness, which stayed with her for quite some time before taking her life.

Immediately, I had a lump in my throat. How much do we value our children? They may irritate, they may grate your nerves to the maximum, ring in your ears with their hard and loud shrieks... but aren't there times when we feel what we were without them? My Rasha was born 3 years into our marriage, and I just wouldn't understand  how I had lived those years without having those tiny hands and legs. Now my Azza joined a year back, and I still feel the same. What are we without our children? We invest our time, our money and our efforts to make them what we want to make them or let them be what they want to be but within our guidelines. Our parents did the same to us. All mothers bear their children for 9 months, going through different hardships, including delivery (which is one step before death!) to be awarded by the most amazing creation of Allah Almighty.

We cannot think a single moment how our life would be without them. But then... didn't Allah say that our children are our tests in this world? He gives them, He takes them at His will. If it is time, He blesses us with beautiful children who grow to become the apple of our eye. He also provides testing children, to see how much patience we take to bear with them. So many ways how He tests us with children. Don't we get carried away that they will be there with us forever?

I have only one prayer every time - if Allah inflicts any loss for me, please provide me the patience to bear it and be with Him all the time, without my faith being wavered. I do not pride myself of having a staunch faith, it is like everybody's just trying to be improved... But only one thing, just like how you give happiness for good things, please grand me strength and patience during calamities.

It is always better to leave everything in His hands and do our duties best when we have our children and parents...